Personals Ad – I / Memorable Fancies #1501

Major Eye Contact With Young Woman Drinking Bloody Marys with friends at the Cheers ‘n’ Booze Thursday ’bout eleven. I took a snap with my smartphone – remember that? But we never spoke. Urgent reason why I want to meet you now even more: that photo – just your Bloody Mary, floating-like there above the bar. So now I know that you don’t show up in pix. Neither do I! I was afraid for a long time that I didn’t exist. But that wasn’t it. I consulted a shrink, asked him if my inferiority complex … [Read more...]

“Johnny No-Title” / Memorable Fancies #1397

“If you were part of a research paper, say, in physics or chemistry,” Hal asked, nodding at us around at the table after too much wine, “what part would you be? Like ‘methodology’ or ‘findings’ or ‘references.’” So I spoke up first and said “I want to be the title,” thinking that might get Hal off on another subject, one that wasn’t so pointless. There were frowns. After a moment Phyllis looked at me and said, “No, Johnny; you’re not the title type. No way.” The others nodded thoughtfully. I … [Read more...]

“The Me’s” / Memorable Fancies #1255

     “Let me tell you about my operation.” – I tried to get away from Jim but couldn’t without being impolite, so I stood there and smiled. Also I wanted a loan from him so I thought I should stick around a while.      So I heard it, heard all about his operation. I wasn’t really listening, just nodding every so often. But then he said “the ‘me,’ they called it, the ‘me’ was very sick and so they took it out of me and put a new ‘me’ inside.” That, I heard.      I wondered if ‘me’ was some … [Read more...]

“Love That Sofa” / Memorable Fancies #1162

[“4. What type of relationship would you rather have with furniture?” – question from a Survey Monkey survey, March, 2015.]      Dear Monkey: I have a problem with my current relationship with furniture. Usually it’s just walking-into, or banging-knees-on, but more recently, as I age, it’s inability-to-get-up-from-without-a-lot-of-effort, or sleeping-all-night-on-when-I-just-wanted-a-nap.      The relationship I really want is for me to be the boss: my furniture does what I want it to, and … [Read more...]