[“Jack Sprat could eat no fat / his wife could eat no lean.” – British folk poem]
Jack Sprat was the world’s eat-no-fat record holder. He won many no-fat-eating competitions. He endorsed products containing no fat, and championed healthy causes.
In secret, however, Jack ate fat. He ate a great deal of fat. He ate fat every chance he could get. He loved fat. He slurped it down with spoons and sucked it up with straws. He ate it fried and broiled and baked and even raw at times.
There were suspicions that Jack was an eater-cheater. But he managed to hide his behavior by saying that his wife Jill could eat no lean, and so the barrels of fat regularly delivered to Jack’s door were all for Jill.
Jill, although a secret lean-eater, won her own competitions, these for no-lean-eating. She endorsed products containing no lean, and championed piggish causes.
So between the two of them they licked their platters clean, and became rich and famous.
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